


Jealousy Only Breeds More Jealousy

by Glasswingsndreamz



Category: The Outer Worlds (Video Game)
Genre: Alcohol, Blood, Captain has a vagina, Creampie, Crushes, F/M, First Dates, First Time, Flirting, Hand Jobs, I know the tags look scary but I promise the violence is really minimum, Idiots in Love, Jealousy, Kissing, Love Confessions, M/M, Mentions of Death, Mentions of alcohol, Minor Spoilers, Murder, Mutual Pining, Oblivious, Penis In Vagina Sex, Reader-Insert, Unprotected Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Violence, family murder, it shows up for like three paragraphs, mentions of cannibalism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-28
Updated: 2019-11-17
Packaged: 2021-01-05 03:18:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21206534
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glasswingsndreamz/pseuds/Glasswingsndreamz
Summary: You just want to deal with the problems on Monarch so you can move on to the next task Phineas has for you. Let's just say your crush, Felix Millstone, flirting with the local bartender from Stellar Bay is not helping you feel any less cranky about the situation you're in. Don't worry though. Nyoka has an idea on how you can catch his attention.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm highkey morosexual and now in love with a couple of NPCs in Stellar Bay. I decided I'd kill two birds with one stone and write for Felix and the background characters who won't get any content.

You tried to ignore the growing cluster of emotions that made you feel sick to your stomach, you really did. It was even more difficult to ignore the root cause behind it. Still you did your best to keep your mouth shut as Felix shamelessly flirted with the bartender who was way too into Tossball. You think she said her name was something like Ness… Wait no it might have been Nell? Not that it really mattered to you anyway. You were just going out of your way to solve a murder and maybe get a few bits out of it. You were not here, however, for your companion to waste time flirting with some random girl who happened to share similar interests with him.

It was ridiculous how fast Felix seemed to become enthralled by her when he found out how big a fan she was. As if there weren’t any other female fans of Tossball. It wasn’t your fault that you’ve been frozen for decades and weren’t caught up on all the sports teams out in the galaxy right now. You had things to do and there was no time to waste on something so irrelevant. There were people to help and bits to earn. This had nothing to do with the growing envy you felt with each passing moment the two spent time talking it up with each other. Nope that wasn’t jealousy you were feeling at all.

Really how oblivious could she be too? Even you had noticed by now how often his gaze slipped down to her lips. Was she really that oblivious to his attraction or was she just messing with his feelings? 

“Well since the two of you are so busy I’m gonna deal with this Elijah bastard myself,” you finally interrupted. Without bothering to see if Felix was following or not, you exited the bar.

“Wait up boss!”

You could hear Felix telling Nell he’d stop by another time before hearing him call out your name. You didn’t bother to stop and wait up for him. Maybe it was petty and dumb to let something like this get to you but you couldn’t really bring yourself to care right now.

“I said wait,” Felix said, grabbing you by the arm and bringing you to a halt. More than a little annoyed, you yanked your arm out of his grasp. “Jeez what’s your problem?”

“Well shit Felix I don’t know. We saw a dead body not even ten minutes ago and instead of helping me take care of the problem you’re flirting with some stranger. Somebody is dead and we need to do something about it,” you said. It wasn’t entirely false, but it was a bit misleading about what was really bothering you at the moment. You hoped Felix wouldn’t catch on.

“She’s not just a stranger, and besides, she seems pretty cool. Nell’s the one helping us out in the first place. If it wasn’t for her we wouldn’t even know who to go after,” Felix defended.

You really really hated that he had a good point.

“You’re right. I’m sorry. Can we just deal with this guy and move on?” you sighed.

“Damn right I’m right. Now let’s go kick some ass,” Felix said.

\---

It’s a minor annoyance how Sanjar complained about you dealing with the murdering fiends in his district. It wasn’t your fault that Eijah and his lackeys attacked and refused to back down. As if he would have confessed to the person in charge that he killed someone over a money issue. At least Sanjar handed over some bits for the trouble you went through to deal with the murder in the first place. 

The whole ordeal left you cranky and more tired than you would like. So you were highly relieved when you got to return to your ship.

\---

A couple of days had passed when Nyoka confronted you.

“You are way too obvious.”

“Huh?” you looked up from the terminal in your quarters and caught her eye. The hunter closed your bedroom door behind her before inviting herself in and sitting back on your bed. “I’m sorry Nyoka but I’m not sure what you mean by that.”

She gave you a disbelieving look.

“I heard from Felix about the girl he met on Stellar Bay,” She said.

“Yeah, she seemed really nice,” you said, voice tense and no doubt giving away how you really felt about the situation.

“And you’re not going to do anything about it despite how you feel about him?”

“I don’t know what you mean…”

The look she gave you was not one of amusement.

“Okay. I don’t know what I’m doing. I’m a mess Nyoka. I know I have no right to be jealous. I mean we’re not even a couple and he doesn’t even know I like him. It’s not fair for me to be upset over something like this. It’s so dumb, and I don’t know what to do,” you broke down, breath coming out fast as you rambled on.

“Woah, woah hold on there and get a grip,” she said in an attempt to get you to calm down. “I know what will help. Let’s get some drinks in you and talk it out.”

“Nyoka, please,” you said.

“What? I promise I’m not suggesting it to only get drunk. I have a plan I promise,” she winks.

“What kind of plan are you talking about?”

“I mean you could always make him jealous too. The bar’s the perfect place for you to find someone and get laid,” Nyoka explained.

“You can’t be serious,” you said in disbelief.

“Well are you gonna confess to Felix or not?

“.....”

“Yeah that’s what I thought,” she said. “Look, captain, I know you like him and all, but he’s not exactly the brightest. There’s plenty of fish in the sea and if you don’t plan to reel this one in then you might as well start looking elsewhere.”

You hated that she was right, but you still couldn’t help but feel minor guilt. It was ridiculous to feel even when you weren’t dating him but somehow it still felt akin to cheating.

The memory of Felix flirting with Nella hardened your resolve.

“Fine we can go out, but that doesn’t mean I have to hook up with anyone right now,” you said.

“Great! So you’re paying for drinks tonight right?”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You're having a real rough time. At least Nyoka has put her plans into action. You're just not sure how you feel about it.

“Wow, I didn’t know you would be that bad at flirting. I thought you were kidding,” Nyoka snickered to herself as she recalled all the failed attempts you had at the bar. Just thinking about it sent her into another fit of giggles.

“Please never bring that up again. I don’t even want to think about that,” you said with a groan as you helped lead her back to the ship. You’d never be able to show off your face at that specific bar again.

Perhaps you should have listened to Nyoka and had a couple of drinks to help loosen up. Then it might have gotten rid of your nerves and you might have avoided embarrassing yourself when somebody tried hooking up with you at the bar. He was even a cute fella which only added onto your nervousness. The guy was even sweet enough to buy you a drink and continue a conversation with you as you fumbled with what to say to him. Then you just had to accidentally spill the drink he purchased on his lap. Nyoka was already having the time of her life laughing at your misfortune, only for it to turn into hysterics when you embarrassed yourself further by accidentally elbow the guy in the face and give him a nosebleed.

Yeah it wasn’t a good experience. 

So it was an understatement to say you were relieved when you finally made it to the ship after hauling Nyoka all the way there as her support.

“I promise I’ll help you next time,” Nyoka said when you brought her back to her room.

“Jeez you both look like a wreck. What have you two been up to?” Ellie said, catching sight of you and Nyoka.

Nyoka did her best to stifle her laughter at the question, absolutely replaying what happened in her mind again. You could feel your face heating up in embarrassment as Nyoka explained what happened at the bar in between her fits of giggles.

“Wow, I didn’t think you’d actually go after someone else,” Ellie said, a hint of amusement on her face. At least she didn’t laugh out right in your face at how badly you managed to fuck up.

“Huh? What do you mean?” you asked.

“At least half the crew knew about your little crush on Felix. I’m just glad you’re over it now. I never really got why you were interested in him in the first place.”

“You have to be joking. Please tell me nobody else knows about my crush,” you practically beg, hoping it’s all an elaborate prank.

“Wait. Don’t tell me you still like him.”

You couldn’t look her in the eye.

She sighed as if disappointed. Your lack of a response was enough of a confirmation to her. “Y’know, I really don’t understand it. At least go through with it and confess to him or something. We’re all getting sick of the way you look at him like a lovesick puppy. It’s disgusting.”

Well that certainly did nothing to help ease the uncomfortable feeling that had been lingering for hours now.

“Ohh forget about her. Don’t even worry about it. I have a plan. I have a plan for you. It’s gonna be fantastic,” Nyoka reassured you, slapping you on the back. The fact that she was drunk did not ease your fears in the slightest either.

“Yeah, thanks Nyoka,” you said as you lead her to her bed. She fell back on the bed, nearly passing out immediately as soon as most of her body was on top of the surface. With a groan you fixed her legs so she was laying horizontally on her bed instead of nearly falling off. By that time she was already deep in sleep. Gripping one of her boots in your hand, you tugged back on it and slid it off her foot and set it beside her bed and did the same with the other boot she wore.

Feeling even more worn out than before, you turned off the light in Nyoka’s room, shutting the door behind you and finally returning to your own quarters on the ship.

You barely had the energy to slip off your clothes and change into something more comfortable to sleep in. It was a relief when your head finally hit the pillow and you pulled the covers up to your chin.

Tomorrow you would brush off today’s events. Tomorrow you would move on and it would be a better day. At least that’s what you hoped for as you drifted off to sleep.

\---

The next day was not much better. In fact it was a far worse, but in a very different way.

“Wow, I’m glad we didn’t stay for lunch,” Felix said as you, Nyoka and him exited the house, blood stained on all of your clothes. It nearly took all your restraint to keep the bile from rising in your throat. You swallowed back the burning acrid taste of it.

It wasn’t the first time you had killed a human being. Far from it at this point. 

_ We killed a family. _

Sure they were cannibals. Sure they were even going to feed you human flesh without any of you knowing. Most likely they were going to kill and eat all three of you two if you hadn’t killed your way out of it. Even if you hadn’t discovered the body upstairs.

_ They would have killed us if we didn’t fight back. _

You take deep breaths as you try to block the images of the gruesomeness of it out of your mind. Their children seemed to be innocent for the most part. That’s what made it so much worse. It was as if the son had no clue what was going on. Fuck.

_ Fuck. _

“Boss?” Felix is the first to notice. His voice was soft, cautious and the way he’s looking at you makes you feel crushed. He looks alarmed, almost a mix of fear and shock. It’s then that you notice the wetness on your cheeks.

“Hey, hey, you’re alright,” Nyoka said, moving to your side and gently rubbing your back. “It’s okay. We didn’t have a choice...”

"Yeah, who knows what might have happened if we just left them," Felix joined in, both companions now crowded around you. After all, it was a rare occurrence to see their captain so vulnerable.

It was meant to be reassuring, a comfort to hear, but you knew it was a lie. You could have just gone out the other door that lead to the balcony. You could have retrieved Braxton’s ID and left. Even then you would have been haunted. The question of whether or not they would continue to kill others and eat the evidence. It had to be stopped and you chose to end it before anything else could happen. Still the voice in the back of your head nagged at you, asking questions that made you want to scream.  _ What if you could have done something different? What if you could have convinced them to stop?  _

It didn’t matter now. You had made your choice and you would have to accept the consequences that came with the blood on your hands.

The tears wouldn't stop no matter how hard you tried to keep them at bay. It was the first time your crew members had seen you cry. In fact it was the first time you've cried since you left the Hope. It wasn't just this situation that caused you to break. Everything that had lead up to this point crashed into you. This was just the last crack in the wall that sent everything crumbling.

\---

It took a couple day to push down the events from the other day. It was enough for you to collect your bearings and return to your duties. There were things that needed to be done whether you were up for it or not. Besides you had faced worse and lived through it all the same. This was no different. It was almost strange how much easier it was getting to handle the horrible situations you kept running into. The crew all seemed to pick up on your emotions, once you returned to the ship, each of them offering their support in their own way. Both Nyoka and Felix kept a close eye on you, doing their best to cheer you up and keep your mind off of things. They probably thought it was only because of the other day since you didn't bother to explain the mental breakdown you had in front of them. Their kindness was more than what you could ask for.

Now you were ready to move on and most likely bottle everything up again until the next bursting point came along.

“I’m so sorry,” you said when you returned Braxton’s ID tag to Velma and explained what became of the worker. It was a horrible situation which made you feel even worse for what you were about to ask for next.

“I know I mentioned this before and I’m sorry to ask, but could we get that poster Grimm has been asking for?” you asked in a rush, already feeling anxious about having to ask for it after reporting her friend’s death. 

“Yeah, yeah. I guess it’s only right after what you did,” Velma said.

Inwardly you cringed at how defeated she looked when she handed over the poster you had been trying to get your hands on since the moment you landed on this headache-inducing planet.

Awwwww, poor Nell, you thought as you tried to conceal your smile. It was petty but you couldn't help but feel giddy that you had actually bested her in the situation. Besides, from what you had heard, Grimm seemed much more desperate for it considering how persistent he's been. Besides, you agreed to help him out first anyway.

"Hey Grimm, we got your poster finally. Sorry it took a while," you said once you found him near the landing dock. It wasn't difficult considering he was almost exactly in the same place you first met him.

It was cute how excited he was when you handed it over.

"Wow! I really can't thank you enough," Grimm said ecstatically. "Here, you've earned them."

"Actually," Nyoka interrupted before he could finish pulling out his bit cartridges. "I think there's something else you could do for the captain," she said, giving you a wink.

_ Oh no. _

"Oh sure. What can I do for you?" He asked with a kind smile. His gaze landed on you expectantly, as if you knew what the hell Nyoka was talking about.

“Why don’t you take our lovely captain out to the bar tonight and spend those bits on them there,” Nyoka suggested innocently. 

“Like a date?” Grimm asked.

“Exactly!”

“Well I get off around six, if you don’t mind waiting until then. Did you want to meet there?” he asked you.

“Y-yeah that sounds fine,” you said, taking a moment to respond as you struggled to form words. Of course Nyoka would have something like this planned, and in front of Felix too! It would feel too rude to say no now after he already agreed to it. You hadn’t even been the one to ask Grimm out and yet you still felt guilt creeping into your gut. There was curiosity too, chanting for you to look and see how Felix reacted. The idea that he might not even care at all is what kept you staring straight ahead.

“Woah boss, you’re really gonna go out with someone who made us do his dirty work?”

Looks like you wouldn’t even have to guess how he felt about it after all.

“Huh? It was just a poster, Felix. It’s not a big deal,” you said, genuinely surprised by the outburst. When you turn to face him, he seems not at all pleased by the escalating situation, but he doesn’t add anything more to the conversation.

“I’ll see you later then,” Grimm said.

_ Fuck, his smile was really cute. _

“I’ve gotta say captain, it took you long enough to finally get a date,” Nyoka joked when you all made it back to the ship, earning an unamused look from you.

“I still don’t know why you agreed to it. The guy’s a moron,” Felix said.

You decided to ignore the irony in that.

“I don’t know. He seems like their type,” Nyoka smirked at you. “He’s cute, dumb, and nice enough.”

“Sounds like they have bad taste.”

Nyoka burst into laughter at Felix’s comment. Turning around, you headed towards your quarters as you attempted to force yourself to stop blushing. After all, you had a date to get ready for later.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> To Felix's disbelief, you go through with your little 'date'.

“Wait, so you’re telling me that the captain is out on a date?” Parvati asked, glancing in Felix’s direction. There was a look of surprise on her face, as if she couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

“You heard me. That’s why they left a little earlier,” Nyoka said.

“That does explain why they were so nervous lookin’. Oh I hope they’re alright,” Parvati said, brows scrunching in concern.

“I can’t believe they’re actually going through with it. I thought it was a joke,” Felix joined in the conversation. Both of the women glanced at each other, sharing a knowing look before returning their attention to their fellow companion. His tone of voice did nothing to hide his displeasure.

“I thought they’d be going out with you. I didn’t know they were on a date with a stranger instead,” Parvati said.

“Huh?” 

“Oh! Nothing- I just thought…. Oh well it’s nothing. Just forget I said anything,” Parvati said, shooting up from her chair. “Would you look at that, I just remembered I needed to be fixing up something on the ship,” she said, exiting the dining room before Felix could question her further. He only leaned back in his chair, feeling even more confused than before.

“I don’t know why you’re so upset. He’s kind of cute. Besides, the captain really needed to get laid. I’m sure they could use a good fuck after all the shit they’ve been dealing with lately. I mean it’s been like, what? Over seventy years since they’ve been at it with someone, technically, if they have at all. I know for a fact they haven’t had the chance to fuck around with how busy they are,” Nyoka said with a shrug. “I’m happy for the captain. They deserve a break.”

Felix was momentarily taken aback by her words.

“You don’t think they’ll actually  _ do anything _ , do you?” he asked, sounding uncharacteristically quiet.

Nyoka snorted, taking another swig from her drink. “I sure hope they do.”

Felix slammed his hands on the table, shooting up in a panic and nearly making Nyoka spill her drink on the table.

“But what if he’s actually a bad guy, pretending to need help to make the boss trust him? I bet he was hoping they’d agree to go out on a date with him so he could get closer and attack them without us to back them up. It’s all going according to his plan,” Felix spoke more to himself than his companion. “Shit, Nyoka, we need to find them now before it’s too late!”

“Are you serious right now? You gotta calm down. Don’t forget, I’m the one who suggested they go on a date in the first place,” she reminded him.

“Maybe…. Or maybe that’s just what he wants us to think! It’s all part of his evil plan and he was just manipulating you. We better head out before anything happens-”

“Look- Felix,” she interrupted as he stood up, more than ready to run to your rescue. “Are you really worried about them or are you just making excuses because you might actually be jealous and want to ruin their date?” 

“Jealous?” He scoffed. “Why would I be jealous? I’m just looking out for the boss.”

She couldn’t be sure. There was no real way to know with Felix. Nyoka wasn’t sure if he’s jealous and doesn’t realize it or he’s really being this dumb right now. She desperately hoped it was the former option. 

“Well, even if you were right, we don’t need to worry about them. You and I both know the captain can take care of themselves without a problem,” that was all she could think of to say. She hoped that was enough to convince him to stay out of their captain’s business because she doubted there was anything else she could come up with right now to deter him. Currently she wasn’t in the mood to be chasing after Felix to stop him from ruining your date. She’d need to be a lot drunker to deal with that.

She doesn’t get to see what happened next, instead choosing to head back to her room to get another drink from her stash.

\---

Well if Nyoka wasn’t going to help him save the boss, then he’d do it himself. That’s what Felix decided as he exited the ship. He couldn’t even begin to understand how she couldn’t even be bothered to worry about you. Felix didn’t trust that Grimm guy, and there was no way in hell he was going to let the bastard hurt you! Not on Felix Millstone’s watch. Well, and Parvati’s watch too. At least she seemed to care about your wellbeing. She had even insisted that she come too, but Felix wasn’t complaining. It never hurt to have back up in cases like these, or have someone to watch him beat up the bad guy.

Honestly he really tried to wait it out. He barely lasted half an hour before he couldn’t take it anymore. He wanted to have faith in your abilities, he did believe in you, of course! However, the sight of your tear stained cheeks kept showing up in his mind, reminding him that you were more vulnerable than he thought. That reminder is what eventually made him cave in and follow his instincts.

“Felix, do you even know where they went for their date?” Parvati asked, following behind.

No, no he did not.

“Well… Not exactly? I mean,they talked about going to a bar. There’s like two bars here so it shouldn’t be too hard to find them,” Felix admitted.

“Are you really sure we should be doing this? Don’t you think our captain might be upset with us for spying on their date?” Parvati asked, sounding slightly anxious. Although she didn’t entirely want to get involved with the situation, she didn’t want to think about how your date might escalate if Felix got involved. If you really were getting over your feelings for your crew member then she didn’t think it was best for Felix to interrupt. Of course he had only the best intentions for you. He looked up to you more than anyone and he always followed you around like a lost puppy. Personally Parvati found it adorable, but it did make her wonder why you were the one who seemed to be head over heels for him instead.

“We’re not actually spying on the boss. We’re just making sure nothing goes wrong. You never know what might happen. What if some marauders sneak in and decide to go berserk? Whatever happens, we’ll be ready for it.”

That only made her grow more suspicious. She hadn’t meant to do it on purpose, overhearing Nyoka and Felix’s conversation after she left. Okay so maybe she was trying to look out for her friends, but she didn’t mean anything bad by it, honest! It seemed odd for him to come up with a different reason to protect you, especially when he had been so persistent that Grimm was such a bad guy.

It didn’t change that there was no turning back now. Felix was too riled up that Parvati was convinced there was nothing she could say that would make him back down from this frightening plan. She’d do her best to keep things from going in a bad direction.

With how bright the streetlights were, it would be a little difficult to blend in with the shadows. Felix mentally cursed at himself for not thinking of bringing disguises. Stupid! It was too late to head back to the ship now. They were close enough to the bar near the landing pad and where Grimm was stationed near. That was probably a good spot to check out.

It turned out to be a good choice, as he quickly caught sight of you through the window. His eyes narrowed when he saw Grimm.

“Look at that bastard. He even looks like he’s up to no good. What good guy wears an eyepatch?”

“Felix, I don’t think it’s really fair of you to judge someone based on how the way they look,” Parvati scolded him. She stood to the side of him, far enough away that no one would get a peek at her if anyone paid attention to the window.

“Shit, they’re getting up! We have to hide,” Felix warned, pushing Parvati so they were right around the corner of the building.

“Thanks again for tonight. I really appreciate it,” they could hear you say.

“It was the least I could do after all the trouble I put you through,” Grimm said in response. There was a moment of silence before he spoke up again. “Let me walk you back to the lift- I mean if that’s alright with you!” he laughed nervously.

“Thanks.”

Both crew members peered around the corner, just enough that they could get a peek at what was going on. Cautiously the two followed behind, staying far enough away that they wouldn’t be spotted.

“See, nothing bad happened. There was nothing to worry about,” Parvati whispered as they arrived in front of the lift that lead to the landing platform. Felix remained silent, watching the couple with suspicion.

“Why aren’t they getting on the lift? They’re just standing there, talking. Do you think he might be threatening them?” Felix asked, eyes narrowed.

“Maybe they’re just- Oh…” Parvati cut herself off when Grimm leaned in to peck you on the lips. Quickly she looked away, feeling guilty for intruding on such a private moment. It was then that she noticed how tense Felix was.

“This is wrong. We shouldn’t be watching this,” she muttered quietly, tugging on his jacket as she attempted to pull him away from the sight. The look on his face nearly broke her heart. 

It looked like she and Nyoka might have been wrong after all. 

Without another word Felix slipped past her, heading right into the bar he had been scoping out not even ten minutes ago. Biting her lip, Parvati looked back towards the captain only to see Grimm heading her way and the lift rising up with you on it. Trying her best not to bring attention to herself, Parvati followed Felix into the bar.

“Can I get a drink over here?”

Parvati cringed at the defeated sound of his voice as she sat beside him on a stool at the bar.

“I’m sorry Felix…”

Words weren’t coming easily. It was hard what to know what to say in these kinds of situations. She didn’t know how their captain managed to handle all kinds of situations. You’d know exactly how to cheer him up. Too bad you were the reason Felix was so heartbroken in the first place.

“What are you sorry for?”

“You really like the captain, don’t you?”

Felix didn’t answer, instead chugging the drink the bartender set in front of him.

“But we all thought you had a thing for Nell instead.”

That got a response, Felix nearly choking in the middle of his drink.

“Nell? I mean she’s pretty cool and all, but she’s nothing like our captain. It’s nice to talk about Tossball with someone else who gets it, but the boss is something else. They’re strong and kind and always doing what’s right. I don’t think I’ve ever trusted anyone else as much as I trust them. They even took me into the crew and I didn’t even have to do an interview or anything. They accepted me with no questions. There’s no one better than the boss... No offense,” he said.

“None taken. I understand Felix. The captain’s done a whole lot for me too. If it wasn’t for them I’d still be back in Edgewater and I never would have met Junlei. I owe them a great deal too,” Parvati nodded in understanding. “I didn’t know you had feelings for them. I thought it was all pure admiration like the rest of us feels for them.”

“Of course I admire them! They have all of my respect.”

“Then why didn’t you confess?” Parvati asked, wondering if the whole situation could have been avoided in the first place if one of you had been honest about your feelings. However, she couldn’t really blame either of them, not when she didn’t have the courage to confess her own feelings to Junlei without the captain’s encouragement and support.

“I don’t know if you know this about me, but sometimes I screw things up real bad. The boss has done so much for me. I don’t want to screw that up. What if they kick me out? There’s not really any place I could go. The Unreliable is my home now,” he confessed.

“Oh Felix, they would never do that to you! You’re part of the crew. We’re like a family. I doubt the captain would be forcing you out if you confessed to them. You know how understanding’ they are.”

“I guess it doesn’t really matter now anyway. I missed my chance,” Felix sighed and took another drink from his beer.

“Not necessarily…” 

“Huh? What are you talking about? We just saw them kiss.”

Well she wasn’t entirely sure how to dispute that. Sure it was true, but she at least had some insight on what was really happening behind the scenes. The only problem was that it wasn’t really her place to share the captain’s feelings. That would be up to you. Felix probably wouldn’t even believe it unless it came directly from your mouth.

“It’s only a first date, and you know how nice the captain is. They probably didn’t want to let Grimm down. I can’t imagine it being so serious with how little they’ve interacted. I’m sure you mean a whole lot more to the captain than Grimm does.”

“Thanks Parvati, it almost sounds true when it’s coming from you.”

For now she would have to figure out another way to get you two to confess to each other. At least she hoped you still had feelings for Felix or this was not going to be a fun ordeal.

\---

He spent longer than he probably should have at the bar. It took a lot of convincing to eventually persuade Parvati that he was alright and that he’d make it home okay. It was getting late and she looked a lot more tired than she was letting on. Felix didn’t have plans to head home anytime soon. Right now he needed some time to clear his head and figure out where to go from here.

In the end he found himself at the sports bar after finishing his fourth drink.

Nell was kind enough to spend her break listening to him talk about his problems.

“I just wish I knew what to do, y’know? Do you think they might be interested in me if I kick Grimm’s ass? I could totally do it too. He wouldn’t stand a chance against me,” he continued to ramble on.

“I think there’s something I could do to help,” Nell said, leaning in closer.

“Yeah? What’s that?” he asked, genuinely curious about her suggestion. At least he was until she pressed her lips against his.

That only confused him more.

“I don’t get it. How is that supposed to help me?” Felix asked after pulling away.

“I was thinking you could make them jealous. It would at least get their attention,” Nell explained, slightly disconcerted by his reaction or lack of one really.

“Nah, that sounds like a dumb plan. I doubt it would work. Anyways, thanks for listening, I appreciate it. Have fun watching the games tonight,” he said before waving goodbye. He didn’t even bother to look back as he stumbled towards home.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a few miscommunications, both you and Felix come to realize what you've been missing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have never written so much dialogue so I'm gonna apologize ahead of time for how much there is. I usually write more descriptively so I don't know what happened in this fic.

“Can I ask you something, Captain?”

“Of course you can Parvati. What’s up?”

The young engineer nibbled on her bottom lip nervously as she debated whether or not she should confess what she learned last night.

“Well, uh, I was wondering how your date went and all. You seemed awfully nervous when you left and I didn’t get the chance to ask about it when you came home last night,” she said.

“It wasn’t bad, but it’s been a long while since the last time I’ve been on a date. Grimm was pretty sweet. He offered to walk me back,” you said.

“And? Did anything else happen? It sounds like you really like this boy.”

“Well he did ask to kiss me, and I did let him, but it felt a little weird y’know? He said he’d like to do go out again sometime, but I told him I didn’t think it was a good idea. I feel bad for making up excuses to say no, but I think it would have been worse if I told him I wasn’t actually that interested. Sure he’s cute and all, but he’s not….” you trailed off, not sure how to put your thoughts into words.

“He’s not Felix?” Parvati offered.

“The thing is, he was almost too much like Felix. He talked about Tossball for almost the entire date, explaining everything about it from the rules to his favorite teams. The way Grimm acted was just too similar and every time Felix would slip back into my mind. I felt so guilty that I was thinking about someone else the entire time we were on a date. It wasn’t right and I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to try and move on this way,” you explained sheepishly.

“That’s great!” Parvati mentally cheered. There was still hope that things could work out between you and Felix. “I mean- I am so sorry things didn’t work out.”

“It is what it is. Maybe it’s just a sign that I should give up on romance,” you joked. Perhaps it would be best if you actually did give up on the idea of it. It would certainly make things easier with less distractions and emotions getting in the way of what you needed to get done. After it was all over and things eventually settled down then maybe you would take a chance again.

“No!”

You startled at her response, giving her a questioning look. It wasn’t like her to act so strange and she did seem weirdly nervous. 

“Please be honest, Captain. Do you still have feelings for Felix?” she asked bluntly.

“Huh? Well I uh- um, yes I still do,” you said in a hushed voice, hoping Nyoka wouldn’t overhear. You might have told a little white lie that your date went great so that she would get off your back. Not that you had meant anything bad by it.

“Pardon my bluntness, but I think you ought to tell him how you feel.”

“I don’t think that’s such a great idea. I already know he has a crush on Nell. You should have seen the way he looked at her. Besides, I don’t want to make things confusing for him. I know he looks up to me and I don’t want him to feel like he has to date me because it’s what I want. I’m worried that’s something he might do. That would be even worse than being rejected,” you explained. It honestly was so much worse to think about. Picturing Felix kissing Nell may have hurt but you didn’t even want to imagine him agreeing to date you out of fear that you might kick him out or that he might lose your respect or praise otherwise. He was a follower as much as you hated to admit it. If you were going to date him you wanted to know it was his choice.

“You don’t need to be worrying about Nell. You’ll have to trust me on this one, Captain,” Parvati said, not wanting to entirely spill Felix’s secrets.

That wasn’t the most encouraging thing to hear, but you really did trust Parvati. She was the first to join your crew after all. She’d been there by your side ever since you landed on Terra 2 and wandered into Edgewater looking for a power regulator. There was no one you trusted more on this wild journey you’ve begun.

“Okay, okay you’re probably right,” you sighed. “I’ll probably never get over him otherwise.”

She gave you a thumbs up as she reassured you that everything would work out okay. It didn’t do much to convince you or lessen your worries.

\---

Normally you didn’t mind the openness of the ship. All your crewmates were close by within shouting distance. It made it seem like you were all one big family sharing a space. It also made you very aware of the others eyes on you as you made your way to Felix’s room. After learning that maybe your feelings weren’t as hidden as you thought, you felt a lot more insecure about how this looked.

“Hey Felix, do you mind if I talk with you privately?” you asked, hands already growing sweaty.

“Sure Boss, what’s up?” Felix asked.

Fully aware of the curious crew members, who apparently couldn’t mind their own business, you shut the door behind you. Unfortunately, you made the mistake of looking him in the eye. Just as quickly you turned your gaze down to the floor, already feeling your face heat up from embarrassment.

_ Oh boy this was going to be harder than you thought. _

“Boss?” Felix seemed concerned.

“I’m sorry, it’s a little hard for me to say this,” you said. Honestly you wanted to run right back out the door. It was almost ridiculous how much you would prefer to be fighting a Mantisqueen at the moment instead of telling the guy you cared about the most that you were in love with him. The latter seemed far scarier at the moment and had your heart beating fast.

“Oh no, you’re not firing me are you?” he asked, sounding panicked. “Did Parvati tell you what I said last night?!” He couldn’t believe that one of his closest friends had betrayed him like that. It must have been an accident, right?

You blinked in surprise, taken aback by his words. What had the two of them talked about that would make you fire him? Why hadn’t Parvati mentioned anything about it when she spoke to you earlier?

“Please don’t get rid of me. This is the only home I have now,” he was practically begging now.

“Woah calm down there,” you said, placing your hands on his shoulders. “I’m not going to fire you- wait this isn’t even a job technically. You’re part of this crew. I’m not going to be kicking you out unless you do something really bad like kill one of the other crew mates.”

“So you’re not upset with me then?” he asked, looking slightly less concerned.

“Why would I be?” at this point you didn’t know who was more confused.

“I know you just went on a date with someone else. I don’t mean to pressure you or anything. It kinda feels like a dick move. Damn, I can’t believe Parvati told you,” Felix said, feeling unsure.

“Felix, I’m sorry but I genuinely don’t know what you’re talking about. Parvati didn’t tell me anything,” you confessed, wondering what the hell was going on. As much as you would like to know what he was talking about, you didn’t want to misguide him like that. Although you were starting to put together what was going on. It made sense with how Parvati suggested that you confess. There were some implications behind what Felix had just said too. Even then you didn’t want to bring your hopes up only to be wrong.

“Oh, then nothing boss- I was doing nothing. Everything is all fine here,” he quickly changed the subject.

_ Fuck it. _

Feeling more confident than before, you leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek. Okay so maybe you weren’t feeling as brave as you hoped.

“Boss?” he stared at your flushed face when you pulled away, but you couldn’t seem to meet his eyes. “But I thought you said Parvati didn’t tell you anything. Does this mean you feel the same way about me?”

“Wait a minute. Just hold on a second. Are you saying you have feelings for me? Like  _ romantic _ feelings for me?” you asked, voice cracking.

“Do you feel that way about me?” he asked in return, his heart racing as he waited for an answer he never expected to get.

“Yeah. I like you a lot Felix,” you said shyly. He was quiet for a moment.

“Then why did you go on that date with that one moron?”

_ Shit. You forgot about that. _

You breathed deeply. “Okay if I tell you please promise not to laugh,” you muttered.

“I swear it on my life. I would never. You can trust me,” Felix said, perking up at your answer.

“I’ve liked you for a while now. A long while,” you admitted shyly. “Nyoka knew about it and I guess pretty much everyone else on the ship knew too.”

Felix’s heart raced at the small confession. He had been by your side for at least months now. Part of him wondered if you had been watching him the way he watched you while traveling the galaxy together. Had he just never noticed? You were so damn beautiful he couldn’t even begin to imagine how someone like you could have fallen for him and even kept those feelings over a period of time. That in itself was a miracle considering you’d seen him do some pretty stupid things. Of course you’ve seen him do a lot of awesome things too, but how the hell did you still like him after all the embarrassing things he’s done right in front of you?

“Why didn’t you say anything?” he couldn’t imagine that the captain was being shy. They had done so much in such a short amount of time. They lived the way he had been dreaming of when he was still on Halcyon. They were strong and fierce when the situation called for it. They were mature and more than ready to take on the galaxy.

“I thought you weren’t interested in me like that. It definitely seemed that way when I saw the way you were with Nell. I figured you liked her and that I should probably start getting over the way I felt. Nyoka was the one who suggested I try dating someone else. That’s why she asked Grimm to go out on a date with me. I promise I’m not into him,” you said. 

“It’s funny actually. I had to turn him down at the end because I kept thinking about you. I felt so bad about it you have no idea,” you laughed in an attempt to brush off the sinking panic. Maybe you shouldn’t have added the last part. You had meant to reassure him that he was the one you were interested in, but after saying it out loud it felt awkward.

It was overwhelming. Felix really didn’t know what to say. There was too much to confront. Like the fact that apparently you had a crush on him at the same time he was head over heels in love with you and  _ neither of you noticed _ . That wasn’t necessary to point out since you both were in awe at the lack of awareness. He couldn’t believe you went through so much trouble just because you were jealous of how he talked with Nell. Honestly it was really flattering. He may have been envious of Grimm before, but now he couldn’t wait to flaunt you around in front of the bastard. 

Actually he was kind of pissed off. 

So much time wasted when he could have been with you for months instead of pining from afar and fantasizing. There had been a lot of fantasizing in those months, many of them involving him saving you from disaster and you reward him  _ generously _ for it. Now that he knew you returned his feelings there was no reason to waste anymore time.

It was such a rush when he pulled you close and practically slammed his lips against yours. It felt as if he had been waiting for this moment long before he even met you. Felix swore he could feel sparks. It was nothing like the sweet, teasing, little peck on the cheek you gave him earlier. 

You were unsuspecting, unprepared for the sudden attack. The shock slipped away just as quickly, replaced with eagerness as you returned the kiss and wrapped your arms around his neck.

Feeling a rush of excitement, he settled his hands beneath your ass before heaving you up in his arms and pressing your back into the door. Instinctively you wrapped your legs around his waist as you let out a small yelp. Felix had never been so grateful for his previous job and the strength he gained from lugging all those heavy boxes around. He was so pleased with himself for pulling off such a good move just like he’d seen when things began to get steamy in the serials he watched. Mentally he gave himself a high five.

“Felix is everything alright in there? I heard a thud,”

You could hear Parvati’s voice clearly from the other side of the door. In an instant there was a blush blooming on your cheeks.

“Y-yeah everything’s fine!” he called back. “Don’t worry about it!”

Both of you waited for a moment, listening until her footsteps faded.

“Maybe we should continue this another time,” you suggested. 

“Fuck yes,” he said enthusiastically before carefully setting you down.

Next time you’d make sure to do it in your quarters when the rest of the crew members were off the ship.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and Felix finally get to act out what you've both been waiting for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm sorry this took a while to write. I'm not entirely happy with how it turned out, but it is what it is and I figured you guys deserved an ending. To make up for it I definitely plan on writing a separate one-shot series of just these two being a couple if y'all are interested.

If the tension between you and Felix wasn’t obvious before, it certainly was now. It was practically tangible, electrifying the room. Which made it that much easier to get the rest of your crewmates out of the Unreliable when you stopped at Groundbreaker for a well deserved break.

You didn’t waste any time at all getting Felix into your room.

The confidence and excitement that had taken over earlier faded as soon as it really hit you that you were alone with Felix and this time no one would interrupt. Sure you had other experiences within the week, exploring the new relationship and enjoying the way his lips felt on yours when you had short moments of privacy.

“Are you sure you still want to do this with  _ me _ ?” you asked nervously. 

“I’m pretty sure I should be the one asking you that,” Felix said.

“I want you, Felix.”

He inhaled sharply, the words alone making him grow stiff in his pants. 

You looked so serious and the way you spoke left no room for questioning. It was clear you knew what you wanted. He just still couldn’t wrap his head around the fact that you wanted him of all people. He was sure you could have anyone else you wanted. After all he could easily picture you as the type who could easily seduce anyone into your bed. With that golden tongue of yours that you utilized often during missions. It was the hottest thing when your personality switched to serious and confident as if you didn’t give a fuck about what anyone else said or did, with the exception of your crew.

It made his heart flutter knowing that he mattered to you, that you genuinely cared about what he thought and wanted his input.

“Good because I want you too,” he said, mind racing with all the possibilities he could act out right now. What would be the best in this situation? After all it would be your first time together and oh boy did he have plans to make it memorable for the both of you.

He had imagined quite a few positions he’d love to take you in. His absolute favorite were the fantasies when you rode him. When you began to slow down he’d come back with a surprise, gripping your hips and thrusting up into you brutally. There were several expressions he imagined you’d make when you came around his cock. With your nose scrunched up cutely and mouth parted as you reached your orgasm. The ones that made him finish the quickest were when he pictured you staring down at him with pure desire and love.

It was probably best that you took the lead in the end, gently pressing your lips against his. It was soft, as if you were still questioning whether or not he wanted to take things further. Felix was quick to reassure you.

His hands instinctively fell to your waist as he eagerly returned the kiss. With his body pressing against yours, you could easily feel how  _ excited _ he was. Your mouth watered at the thought of feeling his cock pressing inside you instead.

“Please,” your words were muffled between kisses as you tugged on his clothes. “Take this off.”

“Wow you really do want me badly, huh?” Felix teased as he began pulling off his clothes. “Well I can’t say no to you, Boss.”

“You can call me by my actual name. I think we’re well past using titles,” you said, watching as he stripped down to his underwear.

“How about next time you call me boss instead. That’d be pretty hot don’t ya think?” Felix suggested, growing interested in the idea. He’d definitely like to try that out in the near future as long as you were okay with it too.

“You’re really thinking ahead aren’t you,” you smiled at the idea of there being more than just one time. That there would be more to come.

“Is that alright? I’d like to do this more than once,” Felix said admittedly. 

“Yes, please. We better get a head start now then,” you suggested before beginning to remove your own clothes. Felix was more than happy to assist, helping you pull your top over your head.

“Fuck,” Felix openly stared at your body as you stripped down to your underwear. “Can I touch you?”

You nodded, moving to pull him in for another kiss. That was all the confirmation he needed to start letting his hands wander up and down your body. They lingered especially on your chest, giving you a squeeze which drew a soft moan from you.

“Fuck,” he groaned against your mouth when his hands slid around to grab your ass. “You’re fucking perfect,” he said before pressing a kiss against your neck. The sweet noise you made in response had him grinding against you, the palms of his hands pressing against your ass to push you up against him. It was overwhelming just thinking about the fact that there was barely anything left between your bodies.

He was practically a mess by the time you slowly managed to pull him towards your bed. However, he was clear-headed enough to voice his protests when you gently pushed him down onto the bed and climbed on top so you straddled him. Well he would have protested if you hadn’t effectively shut him up with another long kiss. More than anything he wanted to take his time, lavishing your entire body with kisses. Fuck he wanted to spend hours just between your legs, tasting and teasing you with his mouth.

He decided, when you began stroking him through his underwear, that maybe he could wait a little bit before doing that. Instead he return the sentiment, slipping his hand between your thighs. 

It was a little difficult from the angle he was at, especially with your own hand in the way, but somehow he managed to slide his fingers past your underwear. For a moment he pulled back from kissing you, determined to watch your face as he traced a finger along your slit before dipping between your folds.

“Felix!” you gasped, freezing at the sudden intrusion.

“Yeah? You like that?” he asked, feeling rather smug at your reaction as he stroked your inner labia. “Fuck you’re really wet.” 

You gave his dick a squeeze in response, rubbing him harder.

“Tell me if you need to stop and I will,” Felix promised, hesitating a moment to allow you the chance to reject him before prodding around for your entrance and pushing a single finger inside. It was a struggle to really push in far with the way your underwear managed to get in the way. He did his best, curling his middle finger up into you the best he could. 

For a moment he was worried that it had been too much when you stopped to get off him. His concern was quickly put at ease when you pulled your underwear down your thighs. To his absolute delight, he noticed the large wet spot that had formed on your underwear due to the arousal dripping between your legs. Without his consent his dick twitched at the sight, most likely staining the inside of his own underwear with the precum that leaked from his tip. As much as he wanted to tear off the remaining clothes that kept him restrained, he decided it would probably be best to wait just a little while longer. In reality he waited too long to get them off, instead taking the time to stare at your bare body until you finally got back on top of him, hips hovering directly over his own arousal that pressed tightly against the fabric of his boxers. Felix didn’t hesitate to plunge his middle finger back up into your cunt.

Instantaneously you were rewarded for your efforts as he pushed his finger in down to the knuckle. You let out a low moan when he pulled it out only to press back inside and curl it. It went on like that for a while, the two of you pleasuring each other with nothing but your hands. It took only a few suggestions from you for Felix to improve his technique and really have an effect on you. 

In the end you couldn’t be sure who became more impatient to move on.

Perhaps it was you, desperate for more when you pulled down his boxers to fully access his dick. You didn’t get a chance to really take the sight of him in, instead eyes closed as you focused on the way he felt and the way his mouth moved against yours.

It easily could have been Felix as well with how eagerly he kissed and fingered you. Before you knew it he was adding a second finger. There was barely any pain from the small stretch and soon he was thrusting them inside just as quickly as before. Each curl of his fingers brought you closer and closer to the edge.

“Felix,” you tried to warn, breaking away from his lips. You were barely able to get the words out before the coil tightening in your stomach burst and you came with a moan.

“Holy shit did you just cum?” Felix asked, equally delighted and surprised.

“Yes, so now I’m pretty sure it’s your turn,” you answered while attempting to catch your breath. 

Felix was fast to take advantage of your vulnerable state, flipping you over so that you were the one now pinned beneath him.

“Oh, no, I’m not done with you yet,” he said. Fuck he hoped that had the intended effect on you.

It was hard not to smile at the way he said it, as if mimicking something he heard from some kind of cheesy porno. The amusement left your face when he took a moment to remove his boxers completely.

This time you really took the time to admire his body. He had already been decently toned from his previous job. He’d certainly gained more muscle mass after joining the crew. It made sense considering one of the main weapons you gave him was a grenade launcher. He really must have gained muscle hauling that around while running from pissed off mantisaurs.

“Please come fuck me now,” you blurted out before covering your mouth. At least it earned a pleased grin from Felix.

“Anything for you,” he said before returning to his place above you. “You good to go, boss?” he asked once he used a hand to position himself at your entrance. It was difficult to get out an answer when he began rubbing the head of his dick against your slit.

“Yes, yes, please-!” you cut yourself off, moaning as he slowly pushed inside. Without meaning to, you held your breath while digging your nails into the sheets on the bed. Even with the preparation, he was still a bit of a stretch. If it hadn’t warmed you up earlier it might have been more painful.

Felix could hardly hold back. You felt so tight and wet and so so so fucking perfect around him that he couldn’t help himself from bottoming out almost immediately, pushing inside faster than he probably should have. However you made no noise to protest, to tell him to stop and that you never wanted to see him again. That was a good sign.

He did feel bad when he noticed the way you seemed to be holding your breath and trying to concentrate on anything but the pain. Leaning down, he pressed a kiss to your lips in an attempt to distract you. It seemed to work well enough, as your body slowly began to relax as you kissed him back. It wasn’t long before you were urging him on with a roll of your hips up against him. That had him biting down on his lip to keep from crying out at the sudden movement.

He began slowly, desperate to last long enough to make you cum a second time before he finished.

However, that did not last very long. Not with the way you clenched around his dick.

“Fuck you feel so good,” he groaned as he found a good rythm. He wrapped his arms around you tightly in an attempt to ground himself as he bucked into you. 

It was getting a lot easier to handle with each stroke. It made it even easier to ignore the stretch when you pulled him into another kiss. It felt like heaven, being even more connected when your tongue brushed against his. Soon enough he was pulling back to press open mouthed kisses along your neck.

You did your best to move your hips up to meet him, biting down on your lip to keep from making any noise. One particularly hard thrust made you gasp.

“Felix!” you moaned out his name.

Just hearing the way you said it had a strong effect on him than he would have liked. Already he could feel himself reaching his limit. 

“Fuck- please,” he moaned before slipping his hand between your bodies. Desperate to make you cum one more time before he finished, he rubbed at your clit. Mentally he begged for you to finish too. More than anything he wanted you to come around his cock.

“Please,” his voice hitched when he said your name. “Please, please cum.”

It really helped bring you close, the way he furiously rubbed at your clit. Hearing him say your name was enough to push you over the edge. Felix could have cried with pure joy when he felt you squeezing impossibly hard around his cock. He was able to thrust inside two more times before spilling out deep inside.

Felix was panting heavily when he finally pulled out and rolled onto his side next to you on the bed. He couldn’t even try to force the smile off his face as he admired you.

“You’re so fucking perfect. I can’t believe how lucky I am,” he said, leaning in for another kiss which you eagerly returned. 

“Well the feeling’s mutual. I absolutely adore you,” you smiled back at him.

You couldn’t wait to tell Nyoka the good news.


End file.
